One of my interpersonal initiatives of late has been of paying a compliment when it is due. How many of us get a compliment during the daily shuffle?My concomitant effort is to sincerely inquire about a person's day. An Irish barman I know showed me the value of this simple gift last year. In mid-winter. A howling Manhattan wind made even my Wisconsin blood frost. My face a rigid mask, I (shockingly) found myself pushing open the door of a pub. Whereupon the barman looked at me with genuine concern and said "How're you keepin'?" The friendly concern, and the Powers whiskey, warmed me right up. I can't effect the accent to ask of someone's wellbeing in the Irish way, but I think it is well worth while to make the inquiry. One day last week, for example. A waitress at lunch asked me how I was doing. I replied and then sincerely asked her how her day was coming along. She grinned and said "Fine, now that you mention it. And thank you so much for asking".
I have found this sort of response to be very common when you simply show interest in another person's day. People are so happy that you give a damn. Try it. Spread the love. It costs nothing. But it brings a small moment of joy to others. And it is a funny thing. The moments of joy you give to others tend to bounce right back to you.
How ARE you keepin', anyhow?
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8 comments:
I try to do the same thing...and you are correct (and I know you KNEW you were) that the look on a person's face when you ask them how they are give just a small compliment is priceless.
Belle, I agree completely.
ML
So true... I think in our culture we have overused the phrases "how are you?" and "have a nice day?" and somehow they have been stripped of all of their meaning. But when met with someone who genuinely wants to know- you can tell every time.
I am keeping well, thank you very much!
Been busy of late, but good. Thanks. This is a wonderful post and a reminder that sincere greetings can open the way to renewing and deepening relationships.
it's so true. when you do sincerely ask how someone's day is, there's a certain look of almost shock on their face that you really care and that you really want to know. another true-to-life post. always a pleasure to read.
and i'm keepin' well, thank you. how about yourself? :-)
Thanks everyone! I'm keepin darn well right now.
ML
On a similar note - be sure to shake hands with people as much as you can. It quite often will make a dramatic difference in the recipient's day, possibly because it's unexpected.
Well said. And good for you.
I make it a point of always looking a cashier, waiter or whomever has asked after my disposition, directly in the eye, smiling and saying "Very well, thank you. And how are you today?"
Given the reactions, I take it that this does not happen everyday. Even here in the "genteel" South.
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