I Have Dreamed.....

From The Epic Music Vault: BBVD "Louis, Louis, Louis"

Like a lot of people, I became a huge fan of Big Bad Voodoo Daddy when they played in the Epic favorite movie Swingers.  Every album they put out is to my liking.

This new one however, takes them in a completely new direction thematically.  This album consists of covers of great tunes by Louis Armstrong, Louis Prima and Louis Jordan all done in the inimitable BBVD style.  Superb!!!!

Any Epic would love this album for summer swilling and chilling.  GO DADDY-O!!

Tuesday.

Another Tuesday.

ML

One Outstanding Bluetooth Gadget--From BLACKBERRY???!!!

I am thankful that I have a pretty great car.  The first new car I have ever owned.  And it has lots of cool gadgets typical for the price range.  One thing mystified me however.  The Bluetooth telephone connection for my cell phone is instantaneous and perfect in my car.  Not so for the music on my phone.  I have a new cell phone too, that my son described as "sick".  So I suppose that is very good.  But the music on my phone will not play on the car audio system.

One night when I had NOTHING better to do I ran this problem on Google and discovered that it is pretty common.  It made me feel good to see that there are cars costing a LOT more than mine that have the same problem.  Some sort of electrobabble about different types of Bluetooth signals or whatever.  No amount of Scotch was going to make that interesting. In one of the comments to a post about this issue however a fellow mentioned that Blackberry made a little device that, when plugged into the accessory jack in his car allowed his phone to play over his audio system.  I looked for the gadget on Amazon and saw it was under $30.00!!!! [It is under $20.00 today.]  Of course I "one clicked" it and it was winging its way to the hinterlands.

I have to say, this thing, whatever it is, works perfectly.  It is the size of a large pack of matches, requires no tech savvy to start using, doesn't take up any room, and does exactly what it is supposed to do.  I LOVE IT.  It allows me to play all my cell phone tunes through my car audio and I can also stream Pandora or Slacker or whatever through the car too using this and the app on my phone.

This little thing comes with the highest EPIC recommendation!!!  Trust me, if I can use it ANYONE can use it.  Enjoy!!

Summer Is Coming!!!

I promise that the snow will melt.  Summer will be here soon.  Better yet, Desi Arnaz says so too.  This album is crazy good. Get it and see.

Ribbons Every Day

I admit, for many years I was not a fan of Valentine's Day. For a lot of reasons I have written down before. But for the past twenty-eight years it has been one of my very favorite days. This is, as ever, for the Irish Redhead. Mr. Wonder says it best.

My Epic wish is that each of you finds someone that makes this song as special to you as it is to me.  No matter what day of the year it is.

Epic Listening: Uptown Lounge [Various Artists, 1999]

Some years ago, there was this great bar in Las Vegas called Hamilton's.  The motto of the joint was "where it's always midnight".  And it was an outstanding place.  Big drinks, good music, quiet sophisticated decor, great service. Hamilton's is gone now, but you can re-create the atmosphere with this great ensemble album.  This is in my opinion a particularly strong antidote for the current wintry deluge afflicting much of North America.

While the snow drifts down from the sky, imagine slipping into your smoking jacket, pouring a big whiskey on the rocks or a strong martini, plunking down in a good chair before a crackling fire in the grate and putting on this play list...

1. A Kiss To Build A Dream On - Louis Armstrong

2. My Baby Just Cares For Me - Nina Simone

3. Manhattan - Bobby Short

4. You Stepped Out Of A Dream - Sarah Vaughan

5. Confessin' The Blues - Joe Williams

6. Baby Won't You Please Come Home - Gloria Lynne

7. The Very Thought Of You - Arthur Prysock

8. Sufferin' With The Blues - Nancy Wilson

9. Walkin' My Baby Back Home - Nat King Cole

10. The Lady Is A Tramp - Della Reese

11. Lush Life - Sammy Davis Jr.

12. Unforgettable - Dinah Washington

13. You're The One - Lou Rawls

14. Crazy He Calls Me - Dakota Staton

15. Stormy Weather - Lena Horne

16. Exactly Like You - Carmen McRae

17. Taking A Chance On Love - Billy Eckstine

18. Girl From Ipanema - Esther Philips Each track is superb, but my very favorites are Manhattan by Bobby Short, The Very Thought of You by Arthur Prysock, and, without equal, Sammy Davis Jr.'s crushing version of Lush Life.  If I am ever in need of walk up music for some reason, this Lush Life may well be it.  I do not exaggerate when I say that this album is so good that you may never want to listen to it other than alone.  With a cocktail.  I can't imagine hearing some of these heart wrenching songs without libation.  This is the album you listen to after you lose her.  Or when you think of her years later.  And it's dark and snowing outside. You can still buy used copies of this wonderful album on Amazon.com.  For a quarter.  Do what you like, but don't blame me if one day you find yourself in need of one of the best Epic albums ever and they are all sold to someone else. As for me, I'll be where it is always midnight.

Epic Listening: The 2014 Christmas Music List

Holiday music.  I love it, and I find that unlike any other time of the year, the Christmas/Holiday period provides a varied and rich soundtrack.  Realizing the busy schedules of Epics this time of year, I have taken to publishing a list of some of my favorite albums of the season.  That said, please pour a glass of my favorite store-bought egg nog...

...add an extra toddy if you like, and try out one of my current favorites.  Happy Holidays!

1. Pentatonix: That's Christmas to Me.

I don't think that I have ever before bought an album of music while watching a parade.  Until Thanksgiving 2014 when I was fooling around in the kitchen, drinking some wine and making some side-dish or other.  The Macy's parade was on the television as usual when I cook on Thanksgiving, and I heard perfect a capella harmony singing the best version of Santa Clause Is Comin' to Town I have ever heard.  On a float was the group Pentatonix.  I had never heard of them before.  Through the miracle of modern electronics I owned this album about twenty seconds later and I have been playing it over and over since then.  These young people have serious musical chops and their arrangements of the classics are just stunning.  There is no possible way [egg nog or no] that you can be in a low mood after you listen to this album.  This group is like a gin and tonic with double tonic.  My favorite of the season.

2. Will Downing: Christmas, Love and You.

Man, do I love Will Downing's albums.  I don't recall how I first became acquainted with this man's music but he is just superb.  Think Lou Rawls with a snifter really good Cognac on the side.  Mr. Downing has a great voice just made for sitting before the fireplace with that special someone.  The title track added to other well produced versions of classic tunes such as The Christmas Song and The Little Drummer Boy all provide a fresh and soulful take on the season.  If this one doesn't get you in the mood to give and to receive I don't know what will...

3. Gunnar Idenstam.  Folkjul.

Sooner or later, I know, I have to play the Scandinavian card.  It is my heritage after all.  This is a rather amazing collection of songs, some of which you will have heard before [probably not in Swedish] and some of which will be new to you.  The titles alone [like "Varldeus Fralsare"] should lure you in but if you love peaceful, inspiring Holiday music that is unlike anything you will hear at someone else's house, you will love this album.

4. Christmas at Downton Abbey.

It should come as no surprise that I am a huge fan of the PBS series Downton Abbey.  Call me an Edwardian at heart, I can take it.  In any event, this marvelous album has everything you could want on it for your classic and classical Holiday sound track.  Not only do they work a couple of tracks of the television show's lovely theme song into the forty-five tracks on this album, but you get cracking versions of "Good King Wenceslas" and "Come Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" [two of my all time favorites], but to hear Jim Carter read "Twas The Night Before Christmas" is worth the entire price of this absurdly cheap album.  This is the sort of album you want to just put on a loop and play and play and play.  So break out a good bottle of Port, a slab of Stilton cheese and your smoking jacket and settle in...

5. James Taylor: at Christmas.

Ten years after his only other Christmas effort, the fabulous "A Christmas Album", James Taylor brings us another musical keepsake, this time with more collaborators such as Chris Botti, Natalie Cole and Yo Yo Ma to spice up the fun.  How there are people that do not like Taylor's voice is beyond me, but I have always loved his work.  Everything on this album is great, but tops are the aching "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" and "Auld Lang Syne" along with "The Christmas Song" in which Toots Thielemans comes along for the ride as well.  Taylor at his absolute Holiday best.  What more do you need?

6. The Four Freshmen: Snowfall.

I may have mentioned this great album of perfect harmonies in the past but I've had four egg nogs by now and I don't remember!! In any event, this is a swingin' album that makes you want to put on your best red cardigan [the one with the shawl collar--you know you want to break that out again this year] and swizzle a Blue Blazer cocktail [no, on the other hand better not...too much fire involved] or a Hot Buttered Rum [MUCH more like it] while you watch the flakes tumble down slowly outside the windows.  The title track is wonderful but my favorite is probably "Let It Snow".  

I know you will enjoy these albums as much as I do.  For your holiday cocktail party I would recommend The Four Freshmen and Pentatonix, then for dinner Downton Abbey and Folkjul. For after dinner drinks and chit-chat James Taylor and then.....finally....when its late at night, cold outside, and its just the two of you, the fire logs crackling in the grate, Will Downing.  Thank me later.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all Epics everywhere!  

Frank's Day

Happy Birthday Frank.  It's still your world and we just live in it.

"I'm gonna live...Till I die"

Artie

Listening to Sirius and "I Cover The Waterfront" came on.  I had heard it before. A long time ago. When stress wasn't running out of my gills on a regular basis. And it stopped me in my tracks. As always. The smoothest of the smooth.  So I left what I was doing and started rummaging through my music collection [yes, some on vintage vinyl] because I knew I had a copy. But, to my surprise, I did not.  Maybe I never owned the album and the music was in my head all the time.  His sound is like that with men of a certain age.  So I ordered the album immediately which due to the miraculous time we live in was on my Kindle in about four seconds.  I decided to put away work things for the day and play the album while I had a martini and cooked dinner. 

Somewhere in the middle of "Stardust", my son the Future Rock Star emerged from his room, 17 now, disdainful of most music, headed for the refrigerator.  He too stopped in his tracks, milk carton in hand. 

"Say, Dad, what is that tune"?

"THAT  my boy.....is MISTER Artie Shaw"

"Wow. Cool."

Indeed.  

The Saddest Song I Ever Heard

When they finished writing it, co-author and country music legend Bill Anderson told Jon Randall "that's the saddest song I ever heard, nobody will want to listen to it".   I guess somebody did. When Brad Paisley and Alison Krause recorded "Whiskey Lullaby" it went to #2 and won song of the year.  They were good, but hearing the phenomenally talented Randall sing it with his wife Jessi Alexander at a tribute to Anderson is as good, and as sad, as it gets. 

In a genre where sad songs are woven into the fabric of the art, Whiskey Lullaby stands alone.  You should not listen to this song drunk.  Or perhaps you should only listen to it drunk.  Either way, if this one doesn't make you cry, nothing will. 

Epic Listening: Indian Summer, Dave Brubeck [2007]

My experience as a pianist began and ended early on. I hated practicing my lessons as much as most boys do. Until one day it dawned on me that the Young Minister's Wife sitting close to me on the piano bench was more than fetching. Much more. She also smelled quite a bit like Ivory soap. These epiphanies not only inspired me to great rehearsal effort but introduced me to the brutalizing concepts of tactile and olfactory Attention Deficit Disorder.

In the event, my YMW eventually told me that I had to develop my own way of playing the notes. My own "voice". Dazzled with Ivory soap, I had no idea what she was talking about. Then my family moved. Sold the old upright piano. I never played again. It was only ten years of lessons expended. Nothing, really.

Much later, I became a jazz fan. The idea of a player's "voice" came to me anew. Via fellows named Dexter Gordon, Miles Davis, Buddy Rich, and others. The way a master musician can play the same instrument as a million others. In a completely distinctive way.

Sometimes the "voice" can be circumstantial. A reflection of the player's life and mood at the moments the notes are struck. That sort of voice can be downright awful. Or transcendent. Opening a window into the hearts of both the musician and the listener. This wonderful sort of voice is demonstrated throughout Dave Brubeck's "Indian Summer" album.

Brubeck made this album at the age of 86. And that is in large part the beauty of the work. Both the selections, and more important the voice of these songs reflect the thoughts of a man whose life has been well lived. Looking back.

Haunting music. Not ponderous but rather pondering. Thoughtful. Longing. Sad. The play list says it all starting with You'll Never Know. Memories of You. So Lonely. Georgia On My Mind. Thank You. Then, at the end where it should be, Indian Summer. Which leaves you sitting staring into space. Looking back.

The entire album is wonderful. Evidence of a man playing, and seeing, the music in the lovely slanting light of Autumn.

Epic Listening: More Great Christmas Music

Last year, I wrote about some of my favorite Christmas albums. I always refer to them as "Christmas" albums but many of the tunes are secular in nature. In any event, I am pleased to dip into the Epic stereo cabinet to submit a few more of my favorite seasonal selections for your consideration:

1. Louis Armstrong, The Christmas Collection.

You know, we just do not hear enough of Louis Armstrong any longer. This is a perfect Holiday album. Christmas in New Orleans has a particular poignancy in this post-Katrina era. Winter Wonderland and Cool Yule are also superb. Add in guest appearances by Mel Torme ["The Christmas Song/Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire"], Peggy Lee, Dinah Washington and the incomparable Lena Horne, and you have one memorable listening experience. Here is a recipe for Holiday success...one bottle of your favorite red wine, your favorite sofa, your favorite companion next to you on the favorite sofa, and this album. You can leave a little something in my stocking to thank me.

2. The Beach Boys, Christmas Album.

Because it has a cool cover. Because "Merry Christmas Baby", "Little Saint Nick" and their rendition of "Auld Lang Syne" are classic. Because perfect harmony is always lovely. And because at the beach it is Christmas too. This is a great album for easing back the Holiday stress level, California style.


3. Emmylou Harris, Light of the Stable.


During the rest of the year, there are songs from the Holiday season that can carry you through the dark places. Harris' version of the bluegrass classic "Christmas Time's A Comin' " is one of those songs. The rest of this album is perfect. A marvelous effort from one of the best vocalists ever.


3. John Denver, Rocky Mountain Christmas.


Another one of those songs that carry me through the year is "Aspenglow" from this album. It is easy to forget how great Denver's voice was now that we don't hear it on the radio so often. "Christmas For Cowboys" is another unique and lonesomely lovely song. Denver's rendition of "Jingle Bells" is also rollicking and fun. You can see his big happy grin in your mind when you listen to it. Skip the regrettable "Please Daddy Don't Get Drunk This Christmas" and you have a portal to a little town deep in the sparkling snow of the Rocky Mountains. That you can use all the year around.

4. Brian McKnight, I'll Be Home For Christmas.


In case you are not already familiar with Brian McKnight, he is perhaps the best young R & B voice out there. His album "Superhero" is one of my very favorite of this genre. He has a fine voice and his arrangements are suave. Check out his version of "Silver Bells" [can you tell that it is one of my favorites?] as well as the title track, an impressive cover of "Adeste Fideles" and "Bless This House" sung stunningly with the vocal group Take 6. Slide back up the page to my comments about being on the sofa with that special person and a bottle of wine. Make this album one of your musical choices for the event and you will still be there when Santa arrives.

5. Mariah Carey, Merry Christmas II You.

I tried not to like her. I really did. For years, I resisted her. Then, this year, I just gave in. I like Mariah's songs. There. I said it. Sanction me if you will. I love her rendition of "Christmas Time Is Here" from A Charlie Brown Christmas. Her original "Oh Santa!" is great fun as well. Yes, some of it is overproduced, but Mariah Carey has a pretty amazing vocal range and when she just sings a quiet song she sounds, well...., ok...., cuddly. There. I said that too. The album winds up strong with "All I Want For Christmas Is You" and a "pre and post midnight" version of "Auld Lang Syne" which is traditional [and cuddly] in the pre-midnight portion then jumps to a pounding club beat for the post-midnight portion. This is my favorite 2010 purchase for Christmas music [I already had the other albums in this post]. Why? Because sometimes you need to put down the Bordeaux and fill up a crystal glass with fizzy pink Champagne. Live it up. It's Christmas!!

Epic Listening: Summer Sound Track

Summer is in full swing. The temperatures are soaring. Pretty much typical for this time of year where I live. It is time to get cool, man.

This time of year has its own special sound track. When my ears want a mix of Latin, Cowboy, and some R&B music to fit into the withering heat and cool it down a bit. In that vein, may I present The Epic Summer Sound Track:


1. Jazz Samba, Stan Getz and Charlie Byrd. Depicted above. Just looking at the album cover tells you all you need to know. It does not get any cooler than this. Not one but two cuts of Destifinado make this re-mastered CD a must have for any summer sound track.



2. Astrud Gilberto's Finest Hour. The silky "original" [meaning first heard by me] version of The Girl From Ipanema is worth the cost alone, but Corcorado [Quite Night Quiet Stars], So Nice and everything else on this compilation will smooth out any sort of summer day. Or night.



3. Buena Vista Social Club. Just because. When the heat is melting, sometimes the only thing to do is to make it hotter.






4. BWB, Groovin'. This fantastic modern jazz album by a talented trio led by Rick Braun adds some kick to any summer day. Like the lime in a Cuba Libre. The silky title track must be in every summer play list. Add "Ruby Ruby" and a smoking hot cover of "Lets Do It Again" with Dee Dee Bridgewater and you have one great album that will take you through any broiling day. Or week.




5. Cowboy Songs, Michael Murphy. When it gets hot and dusty outside, there is nothing better than some classic American cowboy music. Not country music, mind you. The Original. Cowboy music. Listening to "Spanish Is The Lovin Tongue", "Streets of Laredo" and other perfectly performed gems of this unique genre makes you thankful you don't earn a living on the range in summer and they conjure up just the right mood for being in the hammock at least.


6. Best of The West, Buck "The Big Man" Helton. Re-read what I wrote for Cowboy Songs. Then put it in the context of a fellow with a great voice that makes a living singing and reading poetry at cowboy festivals. His versions of "Cattle Call" and "El Paso" are spot on and put you right in the shade of a mesquite tree with a shot of Tequila. To the extent that a mesquite makes any shade, that is. This album isn't easy to find, but you'll be glad you got a copy when you do.




7. Dreamer, Eliane Elias. Talk about your perfect summer voices. Covers of "Call Me" [the Petula Clark hit, not the movie sound track cut from American Gigolo...for goodness sake trust me, will you?], as well as perfectly styled tunes like "So Nice" and "Dreamer" will move your mind from where ever you are to the coast of Brazil. Or, after listening to the album a dozen times in a row, you can listen to something else and just stare at the cover. It works for me.




8. Frances Albert Sinatra and Antonio Carlos Jobim. Because, even in summer, you can sometimes slip into the Wee Small Hours and need just the sort of songs to take care of you. They are all here. The Girl From Ipanema, Quiet Night Quiet Stars, Once I Loved. Just make sure you really need it before you open this bottle, pally.



9. Once Upon A Time In Mexico. Because sometimes the only answer to the summer heat is to take it to gonzo level. All the way. The clips of Johnny Depp from the movie embedded in this album are worth the price. Come to think of it, get the DVD of the movie too. It's summer, after all. Take a chance.

Summer's Here! Bossa Nova Baby!!

Man, do I love this

1. Song
2. Movie
3. Scene.
4. White linen jacket outfit on The KING...

Bossa Nova BABY!

Epic Listening: Uptown Lounge

It is freezing outside. The skies are gray and bleak. Time to take the hand of your CEP [Complimentary Epic Person], light a fire, sit close with a glass of scotch on the rocks, and listen to some great music. Such as the best compilation album ever. My proof? Check the play list:

A Kiss To Build A Dream On, Louis Armstrong
My Baby Just Cares For Me, Nina Simone
Manhattan, Bobby Short
You Stepped Out of A Dream, Sarah Vaughn
Confessin' The Blues, Joe Williams
Baby Won't You Please Come Home, Gloria Lynne
The Very Thought Of You, Arthur Prysock
Walkin' My Baby Back Home, Nat King Cole
Sufferin' With The Blues, Nancy Wilson
The Lady Is A Tramp, Della Reese
Lush Life, Sammy Davis, Jr.
Unforgettable, Dina Washington
You're The One, Lou Rawls
Crazy He Calls Me, Dakota Staton
Stormy Weather, Lena Horne
Exactly Like You, Carmen Mcrae
Taking A Chance On Love, Billy Eckstine
Girl From Ipanema, Esther Phillips

This album is a jewel box of marvelous performances, many of which I had never heard before. That being said, it is Sammy Davis, Jr.'s turn with Lush Life that steals the show. It is simply one of my favorite recordings. Number three in the Epic list of top songs of all time. That one track alone justifies both the price of this out of print album and the effort you will make to procure it. But make sure you have plenty of booze if you listen to this version of Lush Life more than once in a sitting. And you will.

The back of the album says...

The club fades into darkness. Then the stage lights go on.
The audience falls silent. Slowly, carefully, the curtain parts.
The house band is cued. The music starts.
Showtime...Excited, you hold your lady's hand.
Here, at the Uptown Lounge, the parade of phenomenal performers begins...

It is still snowing/sleeting/raining outside. The fire crackles. You hit the play button the second time. Go ahead. Pour yourself and your CEP another whiskey. Snuggle into the sofa. You've earned it.

Epic Listening: Six Great Christmas Albums

I firmly believe that it is never too late to buy or play Christmas music. I play it all through the season, at least until New Year's Eve provides significant distractions of its own. Also, a great album of Christmas music makes a nice last minute gift or stocking stuffer. Five of my favorite Christmas albums are:

1. Ultra Lounge Christmas Cocktails, Volume 1.

This album is another of the fabulous releases from the Ultra Lounge project. The highlights are "Christmas Is" by Lou Rawls and "I'd Like You For Christmas" by Julie London. Oh Julie, how can it be that we never met?

2. Ultra Lounge Christmas Cocktails, Volume 2.

Another superb album. "Baby It's Cold Outside" by Dean Martin is the greatest version of this great song. "Christmas Waltz" by Nancy Wilson is another highlight.

3. The Sinatra Christmas Album.

There are a lot of Sinatra Christmas albums but this one is my favorite because it has duets with Bing and some other surprises. The aching "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" steals the show pally.

4. Making Spirits Bright, Dean Martin.

This is my favorite of the lot. Every song on this is perfect. My highlights are "Christmas Blues", "Winter Romance" and, of course, "Baby It's Cold Outside".

5. I'll Be Home For Christmas, Joe Grandsen.

Atlanta trumpet man and vocalist Joe Grandsen is one of my favorite performers. His Christmas album is full of jazzy swingin' arrangements and has lots of energy. You can buy it here.

6. Snowfall, Jackie Gleason.

Many people do not know that Jackie Gleason was very well regarded as a band leader and put out several albums of big band and orchestra music. Not many people have this album but it is easily available. It is all instrumental and all swanky. My favorites are "Snowfall" and "I'll Be Home For Christmas". When I play this album, people invariably say "wow, that is fantastic...what album is that?"

I hope that you add one or more of these great albums to your collection. Put one on and have a holiday martini on me...

Saloon Friday Night

Frank Sinatra said that the purpose of a lounge singer is to sell drinks. The sadder you make 'em, the more they drink. The raison d'etre.

Tonight, I am just too far away from home to get home. Feeling the strain ACUTELY. Only Beverly Hills, Chicago or New York can make a Friday night away painless. Or mildly so.

So, I go to my favorite place in this town. Not B.H., Chicago or NYC. And they have a young lady singing in the lounge. Playing the piano. No doubt a student at the local (acclaimed) music school. I was all right until she leveled a murderer's row of tunes, including

Moon River
Somewhere Over The Rainbow
You Were Always On My Mind
Fire And Rain
Vincent
You Don't Know Me
Goin To Carolina (In My Mind)
I Want To Go Home

She drove me to the (singerless) bar of the Hilton. Frank would have been proud.

Drum Room Nocturne

Late night, Kansas City. Last week, I was strolling through the Drum Room bar at the President Hotel one evening en route to dinner. My progress was arrested by fine music being produced by a jazz trio set up in a corner of the room. I knew as soon as I saw them that they were my sort of combo. Experienced players with some years of service. In tuxedos. With a single, fairly worn, band stand bearing the leader's name. Skip Hawkins. Playing with a keyboardist and a base. Mr. Hawkins played flute, sax AND clarinet. Very well.

Sometimes, great music can alter your entire plan. Especially when it is not expected. I had seen nothing to indicate that there would be live music in the Drum Room that night. I just sort of walked out in front of it, as it were. But the sound was so good, it caused me to do something I rarely do. I ate dinner at the bar and sat there the rest of the evening. Typical for a bar show, there was at times a pretty full house and at times nobody there but me. I think the combo played five sets and I was the audience for two of them. During one of those two sets, I sipped my martini and wondered...who is more of a romantic, the musicians playing so well to an empty room, or the one guy at the bar listening all night?

I never did reach a conclusion. The evening was summed up by another patron of the bar who said to his date at one point "This is great music. These guys don't just PLAY music, they MAKE music." A rather valid distinction it seemed to me. Of people plying a craft. In a room at times occupied only by an itinerant storyteller. As the night grew longer and more indigo. Illuminated by the Drum Room sign just above the corner window.

Mr. Hawkins playing another room in 2002. From IATUL.org.

The Esquire Man Batting Averages

Many a stolen Epic hour has been spent with a good magazine. Just lying about. On a raft. In the pool. Or a hammock. Great magazines have a special part in the Epic routine. The problem is finding one these days.

Return readers will know that I have a love-hate relationship with Esquire. My continuing disappointment with the 2009 era magazine is in large part a reflection of the depth of my love for the Esquire of the 1960s and even the 1970s. I grew up as a magazine reader with old copies of Esquire. Through the mid 1970s, I eagerly awaited each copy that would arrive at my parents' home. Later in that decidedly odd decade I watched for my monthly issue to arrive at my college dorm. All the magic of Esquire is gone now that I am apparently beyond the boundary of its age demographic. Now I buy vintage copies on Ebay and pretend they are new. Call me a romantic.

But I love a list. So when I saw in an email recently that Esquire had posted lists of the seventy five albums a man has to have, the seventy-five books he has to read and the seventy-five things he has to do before he dies, I was lured into an immediate examination. Certainly, I thought, this would confirm that deep within the current magazine there was a faintly beating heart of the classic that almost single handedly made American men's publishing noteworthy throughout the world. Certainly, these lists would confirm that a man like me still had something in common with the magazine I had loved so long ago...

I have hundreds of albums of music from many genres. I love music. That in mind, I cannot say how amazed I was at the Esquire list of albums a man "must have" before floating off on the evening tide. Not one by Elvis Presley. I had not even heard of many of the artists. Of the seventy-five albums no doubt selected after hours and days of editorial office debate, I own exactly...four. Beethoven's Fifth Symphony, Sinatra's "In the Wee Small Hours", the Buena Vista Social Club and the Traveling Wilburys, Volume I. An Esquire Man musical batting average of 0.053. The crowning piece of evidence that Esquire has abandoned men of my vintage and interests is that my eleven year old son has two of the albums on this list. His Esquire Man musical batting average is therefore 0.026. Not bad for someone THIRTY EIGHT years younger than I am. If I sneak into his room tonight and lift his copy of Guns N Roses' Appetite for Destruction [an album I really, really like] I will raise my average to the heights of 0.066. Not worth the effort really. No wonder Frank has that lost, sad look on his face on the cover of Wee Small Hours...

He saw the writing on the wall.

Speaking of writing. If I love music, I TRULY love writing. I read a lot. All sorts of things. And I have been known to scribble a bit. In hope of a rebound, I turned expectantly to the Esquire list of seventy-five books a man must read before the clouds close in on him for good. Eight books. EIGHT lousy books. Has my intellectual life been so wasted? So un-Esquireish? Rabbit Run by Updike, For Whom The Bell Tolls, Tropic of Cancer, Lucky Jim by Kingsley Amis, Master and Commander by O'Brian, Moby Dick, The Right Stuff by my fellow Washington and Lee alumni Tom Wolfe, and The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. An Esquire Man batting average of 0.11. I rounded that upward. If you remove the books that someone MADE me read, my average falls to 0.08. Pathetic. I cannot even raise my average by theft in this category. At least I had heard of SOME of the other authors. I felt a literary fog descending upon me. Did I mention that I went to the same school as Tom Wolfe?

Desperate for redemption at this point, I rapidly scanned the list of seventy-five things an Esquire Man MUST do before he shuffles off the mortal coil. Make a perfect omelet. Can do. Recognize the accomplishments of others. One of my fundamental principles. Cultivate a reputation. I've devoted my adult life to it. Learn three or four chords on the guitar and play a song with them. Check. Throw a real party. Done it. Do something that scares you. I did. Once. Overspend. Oh, RATHER. Sing in public. At AJ's in Vegas. With a pianist, not karaoke. Check. Give up your seat. How sad that this should be so rare as to be on the list. Just good manners. Take a vow and keep it. Marriage for twenty-two years. check. Spend time working for tips. Did it. Almost starved. Give a panhandler all your money. Yes. Raise a dog. What? THIS is a "must" to do before I die? Only a dog? Not any other species? Well, all right, check. At least in the experiential category I raised my Esquire Man average to a double digit apogee of 0.17. Still pretty lame.

The conclusions I drew from this exercise were:

1. The people running Esquire are totally disconnected from men like me.

2. I am proud of my musical and literary tastes, and very satisfied with my life experience this far down the road...no matter what they say. And no matter how far down my Esquire Man averages may sink.

Oh happy day!! I just won a new copy of Esquire on Ebay. June 1965. Now THIS looks like a magazine for a man of my tastes...

Forget the grunge/fusion/groaner albums, the mystico-coming of age-in-a-bathtub stories and the "thrill" of living nude for a year at high altitude with a dog you raised yourself. I am going to put on Miles Davis' "Kind of Blue" [not on the list], read a chapter of The Great Gatsby [not on the list] and make a perfect cocktail [not on the list]. It is the Wee Small Hours and it is time for a martini...