Some years ago....
ME [to a real Top Gun]: Does it bother you to fly in really bad weather?
TG: Not really. If things like that bothered me I wouldn't be an aviator. Besides.....there is always blue sky up there somewhere...you just have to keep flying until you find it.
Now...
I really feel like I am flying blind in an endless cloud bank. I do regular things most days but that cloud is still enveloping me. Flying about. Hoping to God I don't run out of fuel.
I have to just remember. There is ALWAYS blue sky up there somewhere. I just have to keep flying the plane until I find it. I know it's true. A Top Gun told me so.
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3 comments:
Dear Epic, may I suggest train travel instead of aircraft? Chugchugchug instead of zoomzoomzoom, looking out at constantly changing terrain rather than constantly looking for blue? Pulling into the safety of stations along the way, regardless of cloud cover. The poet in you may find something in this favorite of mine, I always do when I'm mired in an epic misery place:
http://www.atmos.umd.edu/~dankd/adrienne.html
Hang in there, Brother. You have experienced the most difficult of losses. You know the promise of blue skies is a true one.
BTW this post reminds me of another one you wrote about the aviator and his pens. I still need to get some of those!
By the way, the Top Gun's comment about not being an aviator if bad weather bothered him, seems to be the fighter pilot equivalent of the old saw about loving and losing being better than never having loved at all.
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